Love at First Sight...

I didn't actually believe in this statement until that beautiful day in May when Benjamin R. Tryfon came into my life (our lives for those of my best friends reading this....who share the same obsession for this little boy as I do).  It honestly seemed like the longest possible day because the anticipation and excitement was so overwhelming for me, let alone Elissa and Chris waiting to meet their beautiful baby boy. I worked through lunch and made arrangements with my boss to leave the office early so I wouldn't miss the magic moment.  And I'm pretty sure I was driving at an incredible speed yet hitting every damn red light and turning on every street that was jam packed with traffic.....but don't worry little Ben was super stubborn knowing so many people were waiting for his arrival and weren't yet all at the hospital yet...he stayed put for quite awhile :o).  We all gathered at the hospital trying as patiently as possible (which by the way lacked patience on every level) .... pacing back and forth in the waiting room, reading gossip magazines to get our minds off things, constantly waiting for some kind of update and even going upstairs to cup our ears to the delivery door to hear the slightest noise of a baby whimper or cry. A couple hours passed before confirmation from my "brown mother" aka Mrs. Randall aka Ben's grandma after we instructed her she had scrubs on so she should go listen against the door b/c she won't get into trouble.....She comes back squealing "He's hear...I heard him cry" (I just got goosebumps and my eyes are watering remembering the moment haha). 

We ran downstairs and again tried to patiently wait to now meet him and see Elissa and Chris. Family first of course so Ashley, Lacey and I stood very antsy in the waiting room waiting for the green light to meet our little Ben....soon to become the little love of our lives.  We opened the door and there it was .... a vision so surreal that it almost just took your breath away. Elissa lay there holding the most precious baby I had seen and Chris was smiling ear to ear. I didn't know what to do except just stare at him and take that moment in and realize how quickly I had just fallen in love with this little boy the moment I saw him. After Ashley and Lacey held him, he finally made it to my arms and I have held many babies in my arms, but this one was different.  Instantly I melted as I just stared at him and loved on him....at that moment he had me. 

 

He's growing so quickly it's almost sad but at the same time it's the most amazing thing to be a part of.  I try to see him at least once a week so I don't miss a thing and of course Elissa is saying I spoil him WAY too much .... but honestly what's an auntie to do except that?

It's amazing...another chapter in life as I watch my best friend become a mother and she's so natural and good at it. It's second nature to her really....and I have no doubt in my mind this little boy is by far the luckiest little guy there is and this world and my life thus far is a much better place with him in it <3

 

 

My Next 30 Years....

Tim McGraw put it best when he released the song "My Next Thirty Years"....figure out where I go from here. I have always loved this song and now the day has come where this song means more to me than it ever will. I said to myself yesterday, "wow, I have been on this earth, in this life for 30 years already." I remember being so young thinking, "Gosh 30 is so old and so far away, I can't picture myself being 30". Well it showed up before I knew it and I looked in the mirror and here I am...30 :o).

I know I know age is just a number but it's more than that. It's an accomplishment, it's years of life, years of experience and its a chapter closing and a chapter opening. I watch shows like Sex In the City with a profound parallel of my own life now, when I used to only watch for fun I now relate to it. I, just like many other girls out there envisioned a life for myself that is not even remotely close in reality, in ways it's so much better than I imagined, in other ways I won't lie, it's slightly disappointing.....however light has shown me some wonderful things at the end of the tunnel <3.

In a way, one life is closing and another is beginning. My next thirty years will be the BEST OF MY LIFE; I'm going to continue growing as the individual I am proud to say I am. I will open myself up to new possibilities and while I do so with a little bit of fear, I won't let that fear prevent me from saying, "At least I tried." I've learned that all you can do is try, and that there is no shame in failure....as long as you don't make the same mistake twice :o). In 30 years, I have been blessed with and built an amazing support system with friends and family that I thank God for everyday...and if there were a better word than just THANK YOU and I LOVE YOU; I would say it. Although I feel here, that less is more.

I think life takes us on so many paths with so many choices that sometimes come easy and other times are the most difficult decisions you will ever make. Each choice is lined with experience, sometimes regret, sometimes pride....but no matter the lining, it's always silver; there's always something to walk away with. Something that even though you forget it on the surface...molds your everyday life from that point on. I've made decisions that have led me to this very moment in my life that were a combination of gut feeling, emotion, life lessons and lastly support of those around me.  I'm ready for the next chapter, and though I feel I might know where it's going I'm just going to take it one day at a time because at the end of the day that's all we have is one day at a time. We aren't guaranteed another day or even another minute and we never know what is ahead at the turn of the next piece of time......